Goodbye beloved jawline.

Hello steroids. And not the kind that give you muscles. The kind that gives you multiple chins and acne and a beard (we can call it peach fuzz but that’s not fooling anyone) and belly fat that’s hard to lose no matter how many green juices you drink.

Goodbye beautiful glass of red wine that made getting through the day a little easier. Hello nutritionists who swear everything would be fine if I would embrace the term “leaky gut.”

Goodbye stress, because stress is really bad for lupus (and all of us). But hello friends and family who constantly stressing me out.

So here I sit, eating baby carrots while I type as if that will make me less hungry in 10 minutes, logging every calorie, UV reading, weather forecast and how many steps I’ve taken today in iPhone apps. Stupid lupus.

So yeah I have lupus. I also have a life that needs to be re-built, from scratch. That’s a whole other story. For now, I’m back on steroids… And trust me, I’m not one of those people who can put on 50 pounds and still rock it, if you know what I mean.

There’s lots of support groups and supportive people out there, there are people working their tails off to find a cure, but this is not that. I’m just being honest. This is not a place to list what hurts. This is a place to share what works for you and share your inspiration. To find the good in a moment or a day. For years I’ve been muttering “stupid lupus” to myself so I guess I’ll be like everyone else and have a blog. Here goes…

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